Monday, February 2, 2009

A Goodbye....

He: I am leaving tonight.... will you meet me when i get back?

* A heavy silence on the other end*

He: Will you be all right?

She: Yeah... I will learn to deal with this in time..

He: I am sorry if i ever hurt you...

*She tried not to reflect on that *

She: Are you feeling fine?

He: Yeah I am, do i have any other choice?


*yes, that reply did hurt badly*


She: Our love was like cancer, you know its all gonna end someday, but until then you keep relishing each moment and fight for it...


He: yes, i understand...

*Did he? Really! Because even she was confused about her bitter feelings*


She hoped he would truly understand what she was feeling at that moment someday....


PS: I tried for a 55 fiction.... well just could not limit my fiction to 55 words.... will try it some other time :) ...

18 comments:

Suresh Kumar said...

Emotions beautifully captured in those few lines

***Our love was like cancer, you know its all gonna end someday, but until then you keep relishing each moment and fight for it***

This line was excellent and its gonna haunt me.

moi said...

really a nice attempt

ApocalypsE said...

Nice one...Comparison of love with cancer was excellent:-) Kinda reminded me of this song - Goo Goo Dolls - Iris... You should try it:-)

Charmed One! said...

@Suresh
thank u Suresh...
just tried a little with words :)

@moi
thanks sweetie :)

@ApocalypsE
OMG! cant belive you just mentioned it :)...thats one song i love to listen day in and out :) ... that song never leaves my playlist ...
one among the best lyrics ever written!

seher's shenanigans said...

very intiguing and beautifully written!!!
keep going.. i bet you ll get there soon!

Charmed One! said...

@seher's
hope so :) ...
thank you for dropping by at my blog :) ...

Mith said...

Are you sure this is fiction? Sounds like the story of my life! Nicely done :D

P.S - Thanks for dropping by my blog :) Love urs too!

hope said...

good try.. but a touching.. I was about to cry :(

mayz said...

hey do i kno u by any chance...coz this sounds so much like d conversation i had wid my ex...i went ooh aah ouch after readin that

Lancelot said...

he he he flow of creativity cannot be confined by numbers... (bravo Arun :P)

Charmed One! said...

@Mith
Its purely a fiction girl :)...thanks for dropping at my blog :)...


@hope
Awwww.. thank u :)..


@mayz
Lolz mayz... i dont know you.. so that means am a stranger to u too :) ..
this is just a fiction..Goodness dont tell me you guys discussed exactly the same way :) ...


@Lancelot
Nows who's Arun :P ???

Keshi said...

well written! I liked it.


**She: Our love was like cancer, you know its all gonna end someday, but until then you keep relishing each moment and fight for it...


WOW clever analogy!


Keshi.

Heart'n'Soul said...

Nice... beautifully captures the tiff b/w wt we say n wt we feel... first time here n liked it :)

Chronicwriter said...

they need some chemotheraphy for sure


www.chronicwriter.com

commenting from my mail account cos i am doing some repair work in my page

Lancelot said...

Lancelot aka Arunkumar

comfortably numb said...

55 or not..it was beautifully tragic!!!

Cяystal said...

That was an awesome attempt.


:-)

Charmed One! said...

@Keshi & Heart'n'Soul
Thanks a lot both of you :) ..
thanks for dropping by...


@Chronicwriter
Yeah they sure do need a chemo :) ...


@Lancelot
Oh so you are Arun known as Lancelot :)


@comfortably numb & Cяystal

Thank you guys :) ...