A false hope....

Only if i could turn back time....
undo all the mistakes done...
realized the pain i caused...
and heal the people i hurt...
so many regrets ..
all the memories that haunt me...
only if i had lived my life differently...


she thought silently, as she blew her 5oth birthday candles....

Ps: My first 55 ever in this blog :) .....

Everything is never as it seems...

She knew the answer even before the phone was answered... but patiently again listened to his secretary voice saying .."Neil is busy. he will call u later"
He hadn returned her call past two days... this was not like him.. even when angry, he would let her know the reason and would end the fight within a day..

She had felt him pulling away from her quite a long time now.. He hardly spoke to her, and when he did he would tell her he was too busy and drop the call within few minutes..

There was a sense of unknown lose in her.. she felt the dampness on her cheeks and thought this might be the end of a beautiful 5 year long relationship.. with an instant urge in her to be alone from the rest of world.. to cry her heart out... She started her car n drove aimlessly for an hour .. there were hundreds of thoughts in her head .. wanted the answer for his ignorance on her..

And then she couldn even drive anymore.. She saw herself at the beach where they had their first n many more dates.. there was a small sigh thinking of all the beautiful moments spent together..she remembered his promise to build a house for them here.. walking on the beach, she thought she may never again be with Neil on this beach..

Lost in her deep thoughts, she ignored noise overhead of her .. her cell too started ringing.. she saw that it was Neils call n knew for sure that he called to break up with her.. this is it,she thought... you get dumped at the same place where you had your first date.. what an irony!! With a brave heart she answered the call and heard Neil say "hey sweetheart look above.. at the sky".. for a moment she was confused and then when she did .. she saw a airplane carrying a sky banner sign -My Darling Please BE mine.. she heard him again saying "look to your left" and there he was holding a bunch of red roses walking towards her..


Tears were rolling down her eyes now... he got on his knees and proposed "Marry me.. make my life as beautiful as you" ..Instantly she grabbed the flowers and started hitting him. He pulled her close n held her tightly and said sorry.
"Why have you been avoiding me" she asked.. wiping her tears he answered.. "so that you get really mad at me and come here to cry your heart out"..."I wanted to surprise you here"..
"How did you know i would come here" she asked..
"i know you more then you know yourself, but i dint know it would take you two days to come here".. he winked.. "now please say yes" ..
with a wicked smile and tears still rolling down her cheeks she replied " i shall think about it" ..
he just laughed...he knew her answer immediately!!



PS: I havent attempted writing a story for almost year now... hmmm... Guess have lost a bit of the writing skills :)...

I dream...

dream about the place...

place this world was...

when cities looked much greener...

when innocence prevailed our eyes...

when love meant uncomplicated feelings...

when life read more peace..

I dream of the childhood days gone by....

Love Lost .....

He saw her gazing at the blue dress displayed on the mannequin. Even after 2 long years, he had recognized her at one glance. She had grown thin, but definitely looked more beautiful then ever. She still held that attractive look which made people to just stare at her. And that was what he was doing at the moment. Admiring her from a very safe distance. Something seemed to have disturbed her, and she suddenly turned his way. She looked all surprised now to see him there.

He walked towards her, fearing the possibility of her ignoring him and walking away. But then she smiled at him and his tension seemed to fade away. They stood there facing each other silently. There were so many things he wanted to tell her, so many questions he wanted to ask. No words came out of him.

He: Hi, such a long time.

She: Yes, its really a surprise to see you. You look the same.

He: Yeah. So hows life? Hey how about a cup of coffee? Are you busy?

She: No, cup of coffee will be great.

They now sat at the coffee shop talking about everything other then anything related to their personal life. He was actually scared to ask her about her present. He was not sure to how me may react, if she said that now she had someone in her life. They had a distance of 2 years between them. There seemed to be a lot many changes in her now. She had changed the way she wore her hair. But her smile was the same. He still knew how to make her laugh. For anyone else looking at them now, they may have seemed like a perfect couple enjoying a cup of coffee. But only they knew about the underlying tension in between them.

An hour had passed by quickly and she realized that she had to leave now.

She: Its already late. I have to leave. Thanks for the coffee.

He: Oh am i paying for it? I thought you were, so i ordered the most expensive one!

She laughed, stood up and ruffled his head. And he just wanted to freeze that moment.

He walked her to the lift and the tension was back now. He was not sure whether he should ask for her number and she seemed quite jittery too.
The lift opened and she walked inside. He just stood out and smiled at her.

She: i dont know if i will see you again anytime.

He nodded silently. The life door started to close.

She: You know ... I still ...

The door had closed completely by now.

He stood there staring at the closed door.
Then very silently he murmured "yeah i love you too!"

Innocence of Love!

She sat there on the steps in front of her house, head rested on her legs, gazing at the door of the house across the road. She had seen a tall girl walk into that house earlier. The tall girl had been frequently visiting his house nowadays. He always had a pleasant smile on his face whenever he opened the door for the tall girl. Even his mom seemed to be fond of that girl.

She remembered the first time she had seen him. Her family had newly moved into that street and he with his mom had come to her house to get acquainted. The moment he had seen her, he had stretched his hand out and introduced himself as Keith. She had stood there looking like a frozen sculpture, staring at him, until her mother had reminded her name was Kim. He thought she was a shy girl and had told her so. By then she knew for sure that she was in love with him.

Now she looked at the tall girl walk out of his door. He too was right behind her. Kim couldn stop smiling to herself looking at him. He was such a handsome boy. She had made up her mind that she would ask him to marry her someday. Suddenly Keith was standing very close to the tall girl and whispering in her ear. The tall girl was giggling as she walked out of the gate. Kim felt like crying. So she told herself to be brave and put a smile on her face.

Since the tall girl had already left, Kim decided to put up a brave front and go to Keith's house to tell him about her feelings for him. As she walked across to his house she decided all the things she would tell him. She was praying that the tall girl would never come back here again. She rang the bell and stood there memorizing all the words she would tell him. But when Keith opened the door, she forgot all her memorized lines and stood there just staring at him. She was very nervous now. Looking at her dazed face, he realized something very serious was running in her mind and called her in. She shook her head and told him that she would prefer sitting on the swing in the porch. She sat next to him staring down at the floor, busy fidgeting her fingers.

"So whats running in your mind sweetlin?" he asked her.

He would always tease and call her with such sweet nicknames. That was what had made her confident about his love for her. But now there was that tall girl in his life and he had hardly spoken to her since a week.
She sat there, her mind gone all blank.

"Who is that tall girl Keith?", She asked
"She is my special someone sweetlin" he replied.

Now she was fuming with anger at Keith for calling the tall girl special someone.

"What am i then?" she asked.

"You are my darling!" He replied.
"You know i dont like that tall girl. I love you!" She quietly said tears rolling down her pretty cheeks, staring at the floor unable to look at him.

Keith hugged her tightly and told her,

"My little angel, you are just 9 years old. You are too young to learn anything about love. one fine day you will grow up and learn the real magic surrounding it"
Little did he know that she would always consider him her first love ....


When you are young, Love is innocent,
In your teen, love turns into excitement,
As you grow older, you learn that love becomes a commitment!

Happy Valentines day people! :)

A Goodbye....

He: I am leaving tonight.... will you meet me when i get back?

* A heavy silence on the other end*

He: Will you be all right?

She: Yeah... I will learn to deal with this in time..

He: I am sorry if i ever hurt you...

*She tried not to reflect on that *

She: Are you feeling fine?

He: Yeah I am, do i have any other choice?


*yes, that reply did hurt badly*


She: Our love was like cancer, you know its all gonna end someday, but until then you keep relishing each moment and fight for it...


He: yes, i understand...

*Did he? Really! Because even she was confused about her bitter feelings*


She hoped he would truly understand what she was feeling at that moment someday....


PS: I tried for a 55 fiction.... well just could not limit my fiction to 55 words.... will try it some other time :) ...

A Shooting Star!

She stands there gazing at the night sky ...

Hopeless Soul seeking a miracle ...

Somewhere far, a shooting star fades away ...

She makes a wish ...

Cold winds whisper in her ear ...

Her wishes come true ...

Life now sees a new ray of hope ...

She smiles back at the sky ...


Or was it all a figment of her imagination!

A Hope.....

Feel Free, Fly High..

A glass window, A crash against it!

Broken wings, Broken spirit..

A wish to fly again, A wounded soul..

A healing hand, A hope to fly again..


And Life continues.....


PS: This is about a cuckoo that crashed against our window ten days back... even though it is badly injured, the spirit with which the bird tries to fly again is amazing.. Few days back when we had kept the bird outside to enjoy the morning sun, a eagle out of no where came down and carried it away.. but then it dropped it back immediately into our neighbor's compound.. the bird was injured again due to the fall.. but it never lost its spirit... every day i look at it gazing up into the sky and trying to fly again...
And am very sure it will fly away one day....

Guess we all have something to learn from this....

By default.....

We Live.... We See.... We Feel.... We Want.... We Crave.... We Pray.... We Get.... We Ignore.... We Lose.... We Regret.... We Repent....


But we never really learn!


Is this a common human defect?